Fighting and Fucking

For me, there's a certain level of v******e involved in sex. I don't mean I have abusive partners, far from it. I've never had a bruise or a cut or anything like that caused by a lover. I enjoy physical intimacy, which can include non-sexual acts such as cuddling as well as sexual acts. There's also a sort of intimacy that comes from fighting. Not serious fighting, of course, but playful hitting, wrestling, and biting, for me, is very satisfying. I like being spanked, even being slapped in the face. I also enjoy being pinned down, either someone holding me against them, or holding me so I can't move my arms or something like that. Since what I enjoy is dangerous, and has the potential for me to get seriously hurt, either physically or mentally, I make sure it's someone who respects me enough to stop when I say so or to be gentler if need be. I feel like I do things that could be misinterpreted as an unwillingness, but are meant to try and provoke a reaction that I want. Lying in bed, I'll move away from my lover in hopes he'll grab me and pin me to his chest, or I won't respond to his prompts so he'll grab me to get a reaction. It's a bit awkward for me to ask for things, and when it's something weird like this, I don't know how to put it into words, so all I can do is act and hope for the right reaction. I feel like any way I could possibly word it would end up with the response being no. "Hey, can you pin me to your chest and not let me move no matter how hard I try?" or "Let's have some rough fucking sex?" Both those seem awkward to me, and the second one I don't think I'd even be able to say out loud.